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Metropolis Reality Forums Ť The Guy's Rules? ť

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   The Guy's Rules?

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Topic: The Guy's Rules? (Read 161 times)

luci
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Posts: 12045

The Guy's Rules?
« on: Jul 21^st, 2004, 7:55pm »

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The Guys' Rules
> >
> > At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
> >
> > Finally, the guys' side of the story.
> > (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
> >
> >
> > We always hear "the rules"
> > from the female side.
> > Now here are the rules from the male side.
> > These are our rules!
> > Please note... these are all numbered "1"
> > ON PURPOSE!
> >
> > 1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
> > You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
> > We need it up, you need it down.
> > You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
> >
> > 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
> > or the changing of the tides.
> > Let it be.
> >
> > 1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
> > And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
> >
> > 1. Crying is blackmail.
> >
> > 1. Ask for what you want.
> > Let us be clear on this one:
> > Subtle hints do not work!
> > Strong hints do not work!
> > Obvious hints do not work!
> > Just say it!
> >
> > 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
> >
> > 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
> > That's what we do.
> > Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
> >
> > 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
> > See a doctor.
> >
> > 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
> > In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
> >
> > 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
> > don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
> >
> > 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
> > Don't ask us.
> >
> > 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
> > and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
> > we meant the other one.
> >
> > 1. You can either ask us to do something
> > or tell us how you want it done.
> > Not both.
> > If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
> >
> > 1. Whenever possible,
> > please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
> >
> > 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
> >
> > 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
> > Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
> > We have no idea what mauve is.
> >
> > 1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
> > We do that.
> >
> > 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
> > we will act like nothing's wrong..
> > We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
> >
> > 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
> > expect an answer you don't want to hear.
> >
> > 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear
> > is fine...Really.
> >
> > 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
> > prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
> > or monster trucks.
> >
> > 1. You have enough clothes.
> >
> > 1. You have too many shoes.
> >
> > 1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
> >
> > 1. Thank you for reading this.
> > Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
> > but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
> >
> > Pass this to as many men as you can -
> > to give them a laugh.
> >
> > Pass this to as many women as you can -
> > to give them a bigger laugh!!
> >

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"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and
can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Pau
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Proud to be Filipino!

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Posts: 3042

Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #1 on: Jul 21^st, 2004, 8:23pm »

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nice luci... this is great!... Cheesy

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Check out my travel blogs at http://www.pautravels.com

lakelady
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Posts: 11251

Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #2 on: Jul 21^st, 2004, 9:13pm »

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Somehow, Bumper comes to mind. Can't figure out why though. Wink

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luci
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Posts: 12045

Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #3 on: Jul 21^st, 2004, 10:04pm »

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I can

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"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and
can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Bumper
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Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #4 on: Jul 21^st, 2004, 11:43pm »

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Who the hell do you think WROTE those rules! :deal:

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If U R reading these old posts, know that we were once a great, active cyber-community, but as in all things..Time moves on. This is now a Ghost Town.

AoM
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Posts: 2277

Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #5 on: Jul 22^nd, 2004, 8:14am »

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*LOL* I have sent that to my bf once or twice and each time he says "If you know them why can't you follow them?"

*L*

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JP
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Ditch IE. Use Firefox.

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Posts: 14706

Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #6 on: Jul 22^nd, 2004, 4:19pm »

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1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

**** :laff:

my dad should tell this more often to my mom.

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dudeguy89
You Bet Your ASS Team
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Re: The Guy's Rules?
« Reply #7 on: Jul 22^nd, 2004, 9:56pm »

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This one is universal for all men. Fathers, husbands, boyfreinds, sons alike. Please all women, pay attention to this one.

1. Don't ask us if we want to do something and then tell us to do it, after we decline. For example.....

Wife: "Honey, do you want to paint the bathroom today?"

Husband: "Not really"

Wife "Go paint the bathroom now. You don't need to watch ESPN classic. You know who wins."

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I root for two teams. The Marlins, and anyone who beats the Yankees.

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