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RNO - Episode 7: Marry Me, Phil
« on: Nov 12th, 2005, 9:19am »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
The Amazing Race 8, Episode 7: Marry Me, Phil
by Jenn Brasler -- 11/09/2005
 
I love you so, I always will. A rollicking two-hour episode takes us from Costa Rica to Arizona, where the teams add Super Karts, boats, and wagons to their growing list of transportation vehicles. Read on to find out if any of the Paolos drown, if the Bransens will turn hand socks into a new fashion statement, and why Jenn loves Phil (right) so darned much.
 
Previously on Try Not to Think About the Poor Gaghans Being Gone: Six families raced from Panama to Costa Rica, where they visited a volcano. The Weavers were not impressed. The Paolos inadvertently declared war on the Weavers by yielding them (despite the fact that any other team would have done it if they’d arrived first). The Weavers showed their true colors and united a nation… against them. Tammy battled a pile of coffee beans. The detour took the teams into the rainforest, where Tony demonstrated that carrying pounds of garbage every day will eventually help you later in life. The Paolos came in first again, but, unfortunately, the Gaghans were sent packing. I know it hurts. It’s okay to cry about it. Five families remain in the race:
 
The Paolos: Marion, Tony, Brian, and D.J. - Parents and sons/Have all apparently undergone brain transplants
 
The Linzes: Alex, Megan, Tommy, and Nick - Siblings/My pick to win
 
The Bransens: Wally, Lauren, Lindsay, and Beth - Father and daughters/Going to be tough to beat
 
The Godlewskis (Pink Ladies): Michelle, Tricia, Christine, and Sharon - Sisters/Just need to not lose their minds
 
The Weavers: Linda, Rachel, Rolly, and Rebecca - Mom and kids/I don’t want to talk about it
 
Phil reminds us that we’re in Costa Rica. I haven’t mentioned much this season how much I love Phil. So here goes: I LOVE PHIL. I have mega-sized love for him to carry me through this mega-sized episode. Will the Paolos be able to keep working together (and stop scaring me in the process)? Will the Weavers survive being outcasts?
 
The Paolos are the first to leave at 7:27 a.m. Their clue tells them to go to a beach called Playa Maracas, where one person will swim out to a buoy for the next clue. Marion says that she’s been a little slow physically, but she’s still going to help her family. D.J. says that he now respects his mother for all that she does. The Linzes leave second. Tommy says that they like to think that they’re the fastest and the strongest, but the race isn’t all about physical agility. Either Alex or Nick says that he doesn’t want learning experiences on the race, he just wants to win.
 
The Bransens get their clue and debate having Wally do the swimming. Tony will swim for the Paolos and Nick will swim for the Linzes. Wally winds up doing it for the Bransens. D.J. wonders if Tony can swim; Marion assures him that he can. The Bransen girls yell at their father than he’s a “skinny fish.” Tony and Nick reach the buoy, but Tony is having some trouble staying afloat. D.J. wonders why Tony said he could do the task if he couldn’t. Marion notes that he must have thought he could. I think D.J. needs to think before he speaks, because it’s not like Tony thought he would drown. D.J. yells at his father not to drown. I’m pretty sure he was already thinking that himself. Tony has to be helped back to shore by the “rescue swimmers.”
 
Nick returns, moving the Linzes into first place. Their clue tells them to travel 60 miles to a town called Grecia, where they will find the Iglesia de Metal (Metal Church). They’ll get their clue from an altar boy. Wally finishes up and Tony makes it to shore. D.J. is adamant that he carry his father’s backpack, which is nice of him. The Linzes search for a phone to call a taxi. One of the Bransen girls (I’m fine with Beth, but I’ve long given up on trying to tell the younger two apart) tells the others not to run, since their father just swam for them.
 
The Bransens and Linzes have phone trouble, so they ask Tony for help, since he speaks Spanish. Tony gets the phone working and calls for three cabs. The Linzes are pleased that their driver speaks English and knows where he’s going. He tells them the trip will be two and a half hours. To drive 60 miles? Sheesh. Or did I mishear the distance? If I did, PLEASE DON’T E-MAIL ME. My inbox never quite recovered from the “walk to the visitor’s center” debacle.
 
The Pink Ladies leave. Tricia says that they know they argue and need to work on that. Sharon is elected to swim. Her sisters say that she’ll complain when she gets back, but she’ll do it. Indeed, Sharon does well, and she doesn’t even complain. The Weavers leave last. Rachel says that she’d rather be hated for who they are than liked for being people they’re not. Even when the people they are… aren’t really very nice? She just wants to compete. Rolly does the swimming. The Pink Ladies call for a taxi, and a little later, the Weavers find a phone and call as well. They’re eager to catch up to the other teams. They ask their driver’s name (Arnold) and cheer for him. Okay, that was nice.
 
The Linzes reach the church and see that there’s a funeral going on. The Paolos and Bransens are close behind, and the Bransens note that they should be respectful. The Linzes find the clue first; it’s a detour. The choices are Brush and Barrel. In Brush, families take a taxi ten miles to a boxcar factory, where they will paint part of a wheel. In Barrel, families take a taxi ten miles to a sugarcane plantation, where they have to transport a wagon full of sugarcane to a rum factory, then find their clue on a barrel. Interesting choices. They’re equal distances away, but one is physically demanding and the other isn’t, and doesn’t even really require any skill. Well, I guess if you can’t color inside the lines, you’re in trouble.
 
Initially, the Paolos and Bransens choose Barrel and the Linzes choose Brush. In their cabs, however, the Paolos and Linzes reevaluate their decision. The Linzes have apparently decided to choose strength over the alternative as often as possible, so they change over to Barrel. The Bransens switch over to Brush. They’re not sure if their cab driver knows where she’s going.
 
The Pink Ladies are enjoying the scenery. They think it’s very pretty and romantic. Michelle notes that there’s no romance on this trip, at least not for their team. The Weavers keep cheering for their driver. As the Paolos approach Barrel, Tony notes that since they did the banana task last time, they can definitely do this one. The Paolos and Linzes reach Barrel and start piling sugarcane. Basically sugarcane looks like long, skinny sticks – probably not very heavy, but a little unruly when you grab a bunch of them. The Bransens find themselves back at the church and they’re not happy about it. One of the girls says their driver is stupid. Don’t get on thin ice with me, whichever Bransen you are. The girls look like they’re about to have a Weaver-like meltdown.
 
Fortunately, the Bransens’ driver asks for directions. The Linzes and Paolos keep stacking sugarcane. The Pink Ladies reach the church and decide to do Brush. Christine thinks that they might not all be able to paint at the same time. The Bransens finally reach Brush. The Weavers get to the church and pick Brush. Rachel says that they do better with monotony than strength. The Linzes finish piling and jump in their wagon to head to the barrels, which are in a place called the Toneleria. The Paolos are still piling. One of the Linz boys says that he feels like they’re at their aunt Susan’s house, looking for pumpkins.
 
The Bransens paint. The Pink Ladies arrive and greet them. Christine (I think) suggests that they paint from the inside of the wheel to the outside so they don’t smudge. Smart! The Paolos finish piling and jump in their wagon. Marion starts singing “Guantanamera,” which Tony picks up. Either he knows the words or he’s good at faking it. D.J. wonders if he’s in Hell. The Weavers arrive at Brush and Wally notes that they made good time.
 
Rebecca and Rachel bicker. The Bransen sisters bicker. The Pink Ladies bicker. Are you seeing a pattern here? The Linzes reach the Toneleria and note that their clue will be in one of five barrels. They find some marked barrels and pull a few out, wondering how to open them. Megan speaks up that they’re doing this wrong – the clues are on the outside of the barrels. She’s right, and the Linzes grab a clue. “We are not smart,” Megan notes. The clue tells them to fly to Phoenix, Arizona, get in a marked car, and drive to a Super Kart school. Megan is happy that they’re going “back to English.” They get a taxi.
 
The Paolos reach the Toneleria and quickly realize that the clues are on the outside of the barrels. Marion wonders why they’re going to Phoenix, since she wanted to go to New Zealand. They went there already, Marion. Sorry! The Bransens finish painting and Wally notes that he was slow. One Pink Lady (again, I think it’s Christine) is using two different brushes – thin for the outlines and thick for filling in. Okay, Picasso, time is of the essence here. The Weavers finish painting and get their clue; they’re not happy that they have to keep going to racetracks. One of the Pink Ladies notes that they would probably be faster if they weren’t such perfectionists.
 
The Linzes arrive at the airport and get a flight to Atlanta, where they’ll get a connecting flight to Arizona. When the Paolos arrive, the Linzes share this information with them, but the ticket counter is closing and they’re out of luck. The Paolos complain that the ticket guy was rude. They wind up getting a flight to New York which actually gets them to Phoenix a little earlier.
 
The Linzes’ flight leaves. The Bransens reach the airport, followed by the Weavers. D.J. declares that the Weavers will not win. The Paolos tell the Bransens about the flight to New York and the Weavers ask the ticket agent for the same flight. The Paolos aren’t happy about this. D.J. says something about not messing with a good thing and Brian jokes that they should mess with D.J. because he’s a bad thing. D.J. isn’t pleased, so Brian tries to cover for himself. Aww, Brian, it’s okay. I’m the youngest, too. Back at Brush, the Pink Ladies finish and leave.
 
The Weavers literally corner D.J. and ask him why his family yielded them. D.J. says matter-of-factly that they were last. The Weavers aren’t sure why this matters, so D.J. continues that they wanted to definitively knock a family out. The Weavers actually gasp at this. Um… it’s a game, guys. Yielding is allowed. They’re allowed to try to get rid of you. It would be smart, actually, because it leaves one less family to compete against. I can’t believe how offended they are. Linda says that the Weavers have always been nice to the Paolos. “Let’s be friends,” she tells D.J., who points out that they’re getting down to the final five. Linda replies that the Paolos are out of Yields but her family still has one. She’s taking “an eye for an eye” a little too far.
 
The Pink Ladies get booked on the New York flight, impressed with themselves for catching up with the other teams. The flight to New York leaves. The Linzes land in Atlanta, where they’re stuck for the night. The other teams land at JFK in New York and the Pink Ladies head to a counter to see if they can get seats closer to the front of the plane. There they learn that they have no reservations on the connecting flight. They’re in trouble and they know it.
 
The Pink Ladies learn that there is another flight to Phoenix… but it leaves from Newark Airport. They decide to give it a try and rush off to make it. The Weavers, Paolos, and Bransens camp out in a terminal, wondering where the Pink Ladies are. As luck would have it, the Pink Ladies make the flight from Newark, and it happens to get in before everyone else’s flights. The other racers are still wondering where they are. They all fly to Phoenix. The Pink Ladies, of course, arrive first and find the marked cars. “It’s hotter than snot,” one remarks. I’m not really sure how one would respond to that. They get directions at a toll booth, confident that they’re first.
 
The Bransens, Paolos, and Weavers land in Phoenix. Marion is a little hesitant to run in an airport. (Can you imagine the Gaghans here? Carissa: “Are we allowed to run in the airport?” Bill: “I think they discourage it.” Sigh.) The Bransens and Weavers reach the marked cars. The Paolos arrive at the parking lot but can’t find the cars as easily. The Linzes’ plane lands and they quickly find a marked car, unsure of their placement. The Paolos bicker (shocker) and finally find the last car. Marion is frustrated with D.J. and says that she hopes he never gets married because she doesn’t know who would put up with him. She doesn’t know why Tony hasn’t smacked him upside the head yet.
 
The Pink Ladies reach the track first and find themselves at a roadblock. One family member will get in a “Super Kart” and drive 50 laps around a track. Oh, and it’s hot, Phil reminds us. Yeah, but it’s a dry heat. Try doing this in Virginia, where the humidity is so bad that our state motto is, “Why Do I Start Sweating as Soon as I Step Outside?” Michelle takes the roadblock and is told that the only time she absolutely has to stop is after the 25th lap. The Pink Ladies are happy to have a head start.
 
The Bransens arrive and Wally takes the roadblock. I think one of those sisters hasn’t done anything yet, but don’t ask me which. One of the Weaver girls has forgotten which state they’re in. What is up with them and geography? Linda says that if the task has to do with driving a car on a track and it’s a roadblock, she’ll do it. As much as this family annoys me, I like how Linda always makes sure to try to keep her kids from really upsetting situations. When the Weavers arrive at the roadblock, Linda explains their situation to one of the guys there and asks for someone sympathetic to help her. The guy assures her that everything will be fine. Rachel is extremely upset and doesn’t want Linda to do this. Linda tells her not to worry.
 
Michelle finishes her 25th lap and stops to get water. Wally starts and Michelle passes him. Linda starts as Rebecca comments that, even if this task is fun, it’s not fun for their family. She guesses that Linda is just being a mom. The Linzes note that it’s hot enough in Arizona to cook bacon. They arrive at the roadblock, which Tommy takes.
 
The Bransens and Pink Ladies discuss the Weavers, mentioning that they feel sorry for them for having to be at the track. The Pink Ladies comfort the Weaver girls and tell them that their father would be proud of them. After they walk off, Rebecca says that she hates them – they’re annoying and they lie. Holy crap, you guys. Is she for real? These women have never done anything to them, and they were trying to be nice, and THIS is the thanks they get?
 
Tommy says he’s Dale Earnhart, Jr. The Bransen girls say that Wally is traveling slower than the other drivers because he’s a little heavier. The Paolos finally reach the roadblock, which D.J. takes. Michelle is at lap 46, Wally is at lap 20, Linda is at lap 18, and Tommy is at lap 14. He passes Linda easily. D.J. starts up. Wally finishes his 25th and stops for water. Michelle finishes and says that she had fun. The Pink Ladies get a clue which tells them to head to the pit stop, a reserve at Fort McDowell, which is 32 miles away. The last team to arrive “may” be eliminated.
 
In the parking lot, the Pink Ladies find a man with a map. Christine and Michelle fight in the car. Michelle winds up picking their route. D.J. is at his fifth lap. Linda is at her 24th. Tommy is right on her tail and they two come close to crashing.
 
We see the near crash again, but it looks like both of them swerved and stopped before they could collide. Everyone’s fine. Linda finishes her 25th lap and Rachel says that they need to catch up because the Pink Ladies are already gone. Tommy finishes his 25th. Rachel thinks that the Linzes might be able to catch up. The Pink Ladies stop for directions and learn that they’re on the wrong road. Christine asks if they’re all in agreement about the new route. She notes that she picked that route in the first place. Wally finishes the roadblock and the Bransens decide to find a familiar site, then ask for directions.
 
Linda finishes and the Weavers decide to look at their atlas to figure out their route. The kids compliment their mother. Tommy finishes up and the Linzes know which route to take. Tony tells his family that D.J. should have been going as fast as he is now from the beginning. The Weavers aren’t very impressed that Tommy, who’s young, was able to pass Linda, who’s older. They’re sure that the Pink Ladies will beat them to the pit stop.
 
In the Linzes’ car, the brothers decide that Tommy will go pro and his brothers will be his agents. The Bransens stop at a hotel for directions. Wally wants to use the phone but his daughters hurry him out, since there are people on their tails. In the car, Wally tells the girls to chill out and take their time. Hey, remember how this is a race? Wally may be starting to lose it. D.J. finishes the roadblock and Tony says that it’s not over yet.
 
The Pink Ladies find Fort McDowell, followed by the Weavers and the Linzes. There’s jumping out of cars and running. The Weavers are very happy that they caught up. Running. Running. And first to the mat are the Pink Ladies. Wow! They ran into some great luck this week. The sisters have won a trip to Belize, which they’re, of course, very happy about. The Weavers hit the mat second. Rachel says that they’re conquering things every day and doing it as a family. The Linzes are third. Phil notes that they put the “young” one behind the wheel of the Super Kart. He asks if Tommy has a driver’s license.
 
As the Paolos near the pit stop, Marion tells her family to start putting on clothes. D.J. doesn’t want to because he thinks he’ll look stupid. The Bransens are lost and stop for directions at a liquor store. They realize that they need to go back the way they came. The Paolos find Fort McDowell and D.J. thinks they’re last. Either he didn’t count the cars or he’s as good at math as the Weavers are at geography. As the Bransens reach Fort McDowell, the Paolos park and start putting on clothes. They definitely have enough underwear. The Bransens park and the Paolos spot them and start running to the mat. “Paolo family… you look ridiculous,” Phil greets them at the mat. Marry me! They’re in fourth. “Tony, I had no idea what kind of support you had on this race, and now it’s very evident,” Phil continues.
 
The Bransens are just seconds behind, but the Paolos tell them not to step on the mat yet, just in case. The Bransens head back to the car and pile on some clothes. Two of the girls have socks on their hands, which is awesome. They return to the mat, very upset, and hear that they’re last. Fortunately, this is a non-elimination leg. The Bransens lose all their money and possessions. Phil notes that they’re wearing a substantial amount of clothes. Beth says that money and clothes won’t help them win – working together as a team will. Aww, I like them. I’m so glad they’re still in this.
 
Wasting no time, we jump right into the eighth leg of the race from the pit stop at Fort McDowell. There are still five families in the race. The Bransens are at a bit of a disadvantage, as they have no money. Will they beat that? Will the Pink Ladies stay in front? They’re leaving first, at 11:43 p.m. Their clue tells them to drive to Mesa, 33 miles away, and find Fighter Combat International at Williams Gateway Airport. Michelle says that there are only five teams left, so the strong teams are going to emerge. If they can put their strengths together, they can be unstoppable.
 
The Weavers are excited to leave in second place. They know that they’re not liked, and Rebecca thinks that it’s because they’re different from the other teams. She likes being different from them. Oh, these people just don’t get it. The Linzes leave third. One drawls about rattlesnakes. They interview about how things can change quickly, and even if they lose a battle, they don’t lose a war. “I don’t roll with the punches,” says Tommy. “I punch.”
 
The Paolos leave fourth. Marion says there’s always pressure, and now they just need to focus on staying in the game. The Bransens leave last, out $72. Beth says they’ll do whatever it takes. In the car, they try to figure out how to make some quick money. The Pink Ladies are bickering about directions again. The Weavers are a little giggly. The Linzes think they’re lost and stop to ask for directions. A cop pulls them over and they wind up getting directions from him. The Linzes realize that telling a cop you’re in a race is a good way to get out of trouble.
 
Marion is having trouble with signs. She says something about wanting to take a helicopter ride; Tony thinks she’s crazy. The Bransens stop somewhere and start asking for money. Wally stays out of it, noting that people are going to give money to cute young women, not him. The Weavers arrive at the airport and grab the first number. The Linzes are second. The Pink Ladies arrive third and the Linzes tease that one looks like a dog, since she had her head out the window. The Pink Ladies get the third number. One of the Weavers wishes this were a Yield.
 
The Paolos are fourth, followed by the Bransens. At 4:30 a.m., everyone traipses upstairs to the clue box. Time for another roadblock! One team member flies in a fighter plane, taking over the controls and performing a loop. I’m not sure who’s taking it for the Weavers, but Megan is doing it for the Linzes. Sharon will take it for the Pink Ladies, and Brian is happy to do it for the Paolos. One of the two Bransens sisters I can never tell apart is taking it.
 
Rolly is the Weaver’s roadblocker, and he, Megan, and Sharon are going up first. Cue Top Gun flying. (Okay, not really. Just humor me here.) This is really easy to recap. By the way, you couldn’t pay me to get up in one of those planes. Rolly does a loop with directions from an instructor; he completes it on his first try. Sharon goes next as her instructor tells her how high up she is. She also finishes in one attempt. Megan (AKA Air Biscuit, as her brothers are calling her) goes third, also finishing in one try.
 
Brian is nervous now. The Linzes try to psych him out, but I’m not sure Brian can hear them. Rolly, Sharon, and Megan land. Brian hugs the unidentified Bransen sister. The Weavers get the next clue first – they’re heading for the Grand Canyon! Ooh, pretty. Their next clue is at a lookout at Lipan Point. The Linzes are in second place and the Pink Ladies are in third. Linda says that she was so proud of Rolly, she teared up. She wonders why none of the other teams is behind her. “They’re stupid,” Rolly replies. Oh, Rolly. Why you gotta be like that? Brian and Lauren (aha! Lauren!) fly. Brian misses on his first try, which frustrates D.J., since he thought Brian had it.
 
Lauren tries a loop but doesn’t quite make it. Brian starts his second attempt and finishes. Lauren is also successful on her second try. Her instructor tells her that her family is cheering for her. “They better be,” she jokes. In their cars, the Bransens decide to ask the Paolos if they know where to go. They don’t, so the Bransens say they might stop and call. Marion suggests stopping with them, but her family would rather go ahead of them. The Bransens exit the highway but the Paolos stay on it.
 
The Pink Ladies enjoy the view. The Weavers wave at them, then start throwing things at their car. Because they’re five, apparently. The Linzes wonder if they’ll be riding donkeys at the Grand Canyon. That’s something past seasons have had that we haven’t had yet – animal wackiness. The Bransens stop for directions. The Paolos hope they know what they’re doing. As the Weavers approach the park, they decide to tell the person taking vehicle fees to give the Linzes (who are right behind them) a complete history of the Grand Canyon. The kids are tickled by this. Is it bad that I thought that was kind of funny? Fortunately, the vehicle fee guy just tells the Linzes that the Weavers were talking smack about them. The Linzes note that now they have a reason to Yield the Weavers. They didn’t before?
 
The Weavers find the clue box first. The clue tells them to travel 137 miles to Glen Canyon Dam in Page, Arizona. There, they’ll pick a guide and go to the top of the dam for their next clue. The Linzes pull in behind the Weavers, wanting to block them in but not succeeding. The Linzes get the clue, followed by the Pink Ladies, who take a minute to admire the view. The Bransens enjoy it, too, and Wally says they should appreciate it for the ten minutes they have. The Paolos wind up stuck in traffic.
 
The Bransens get the clue, talking about how pretty the view is. In the car, one of the sisters crosses her fingers and whistles, trying to get the car to last on the amount of gas they have. The Paolos get their clue. The Linzes note that the Weavers are driving fast, but they can beat them at any detour. The Pink Ladies are nearing the visitor’s center. The Weavers arrive first, followed closely by the Linzes and the Pink Ladies. The latter two teams pick tour guides, but the Weavers want to find a bathroom.
 
On the way up the dam, Megan has to fend off some hitting from her brothers. The Pink Ladies reach the clue box first and Tricia teases the Linzes by taking her time getting the clue. The clue is a detour, and the choices, which both take place on the gorgeous Horseshoe Bend, are Bearing and Bailing. In Bearing, families take motorized rafts to a specific section of the water and find five color-coded cards, each with a unique compass coordinate. (This sentence was brought to you by the letter C.) They’ll use a compass to find the coordinates of the next card. They will have to go to three locations and find the same colored card. In Bailing, families must bail water out of a submerged boat in order to carry it.
 
The Linzes, sticking with the physical tasks, choose Bail, as do the Pink Ladies. The two teams pass the Weavers, who think they’re being mean. The Weavers pick Bearing. The Linzes and Pink Ladies each have a guy steering (?) their raft who they have to direct. The Pink Ladies note that since they were able to carry five soldiers in the second leg of the race, they’ll be able to do this. The Weavers take off in their raft as well.
 
Megan Linz is loving the view, as are the Pink Ladies. The Weavers find a flag for their detour first. One of the Linzes says that the Weavers are going for the less challenging detour. Megan sing-songs, “Where in the world is the yellow boat?” In the Bransens’ car, Wally hopes that the Paolos are way behind them. He notes that it’s all going to come down to the detour. The Paolos are regretting the route they chose.
 
Brian says that they can still catch up to the other teams. The Linzes spot the submerged boats and jump out to start bailing. The Pink Ladies follow and start bailing as well. Lots of throwing of water. The Weavers look for their next marked box, finding their first card. The Bransens are still driving. So are the Paolos. Marion says that they might be doing better than they realize. At least they can enjoy the view. The Linzes keep bailing and start throwing water at the Pink Ladies. Frankly, I’m surprised they didn’t start doing that earlier.
 
The Linzes manage to lift up their boat and dump the rest of the water out of it. They carry it to shore and run back to their raft with their clue. It tells them to go to Lake Powell, Arizona, and find an area called Antelope Point. (Are they ever going to leave Arizona?) There, they will pick a boat and search for the next pit stop, a houseboat on a lake. The last team “may” be eliminated. I think they’ve just started saying “may” all the time to throw us off.
 
The Linzes cheer as they pass the Weavers, who have no idea what they’re doing. They find their second card. The Bransens arrive at the roadblock and decide to go with Bail. The Pink Ladies are finally able to start pushing their boat. As the Weavers get their third card, the Pink Ladies tip the boat over and start pulling it to shore. The Weavers and Pink Ladies both get clues and head back. The Bransens get in their raft and head out to the boats. Megan Linz says her family is definitely in first place.
 
The Linzes pass the Bransens, shouting, “Ahoy!” The Pink Ladies note that the Paolos haven’t arrived yet. The Linzes get back in their car, happy with the way the detour went. The Weavers and Pink Ladies are close behind. The Bransens find the boats and quickly start bailing. The Paolos are… still driving. They pass the Linzes on their way back out. They also pass the Weaves and Pink Ladies and are obviously not pleased that they’re in at least third place. The Pink Ladies have little binoculars. The Weavers turn around and ask for directions, winding up finding someone who will lead them to Antelope Point.
 
The Bransens bail their little hearts out. The Paolos arrive and pick Bail. The Bransens finish up and head back, passing the Paolos. The Bransens note that they just need to make sure not to screw up. The Paolos start bailing, yelling as they throw water. D.J. threatens to drown his mother. These people need so much therapy. The Bransens get back in the car but aren’t quite sure where they’re going. The Paolos are still bailing and yelling. Marion says that she gives up, though she keeps bailing. She says that if they turn the boat upside down, they can carry it. D.J. yells that they can’t turn it upside down yet. Sigh.
 
More yelling at the Paolos’ boat. They get the water out and drag it to shore. Back in the raft, Brian says that he doesn’t want to be eliminated. The Linzes park and look for the ramp to the boats. One of the boys yells an imitation of Phil telling them they’re first. Megan is struggling a little and one of her brothers encourages her. The Pink Ladies park as well. The Linzes find the boats and have a little trouble getting started. They figure they have a little time since the Pink Ladies are going to take some time to get their boat going. After some difficulty, the Pink Ladies head in the same direction as the Linzes.
 
The Weavers and Bransens head to the boats. The Bransens note that it’s a matter of staying ahead of the Paolos. The Linzes and Pink Ladies find that their boats don’t go very fast, though the Pink Ladies are able to catch up to the Linzes. “Phil, where are you?” a Pink Lady yells. Awww, there’s a cute kid at the mat with Phil. Phil smiles when he sees the Pink Ladies, who arrive at the mat first for the second leg in a row. This time they’ve won a travel trailer. “Once again, the poor Linzes,” Phil remarks as they arrive at the mat in second place. They’re just glad they’re not last. One of the brothers hopes that the Pink Ladies will share one of their prizes after the race.
 
The Weavers arrive in third. Phil notes that they’re not happy. “We’re all alone,” they say. He says that it might feel better if they win it all alone. Rachel says that the other racers are “classless.” Someone get that girl a mirror. Phil reminds the kids that their mother said they just have to run this. Rachel starts crying and says that it’s hard when the other teams act the way they do. They’re the only family “trying to live a Christian life.” Please tell me this girl understands that Christianity is not the only religion in the world. Also, TRY HARDER. Phil encourages them.
 
The Bransens head to the boats, followed by the Paolos. The Bransens are frustrated that their boat is so slow and the Paolos might pass them. The Paolos spot the Bransens, who are nervous. “We’re comin’, Phil!” Marion yells. Not coming fast enough, though, because the Bransens arrive in fourth place. Yay!
 
The Paolos finally reach the mat and Tony tells the young greeter that Page is a hard place to find. The Paolos are last and are eliminated. Tony immediately thanks Phil and says that they had a great time. Marion says that they fight a lot, but it means a lot that they’re still there and together. She interviews that no one can tear them apart. Phil asks D.J. if he’s proud of Marion; D.J. is amazed by her. He’s tearing up. He interviews that he’s seen another side of his mother and in the future he might not be so hard on her. Tony is thrilled about this experience and the fact that no one can take it away from them. They’ve made lifelong friendships, which are worth more than a million bucks.
 
I can’t say I’m necessarily sad to see the Paolos go, but they went out with a lot of class and heart. They definitely grew on me these past two weeks. I hope that after this race (and after seeing themselves fighting so much on TV) they’re able to stay close, because they really do seem like great people.
 
Next week: Christine Godlewski falls will trying to rappel down a cliff. Nick Linz does a flip on water skis. Phil and I pick out china patterns.
 
 
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